The Quiet Tension We Carry

I’ll never forget my first hypnotherapy session; being on the receiving end rather than the practitioner. I was so deeply relaxed that my body felt as though it was melting into the chair.

Then the dread crept in...

What if I dribble? What are those noises coming from my belly? … in front of this stranger!

Those niggling thoughts really did interfere with my first session, which is why I make a point of addressing them with all my clients right from the start. The truth is, I really don’t care if someone dribbles, or if their tummy starts gurgling. If anything, it’s a bonus. It tells me that you’re deeply relaxed. Your body has come out of fight-or-flight mode and your digestive system is doing exactly what it should be doing; switching into rest-and-digest mode.

So, what is it about hypnosis that makes us feel so intensely relaxed?

It’s all about a shift in attention. The focus moves away from the constant whirl of thoughts and as the mind settles, the body follows. I've always been fascinated by the relationship between the mind and body. Troubling thoughts create tension and tension creates anxious thoughts - it works both ways.

Reduce the tension and often the anxious thinking begins to melt away too.

One of the most common places we hold tension is in the jaw. There are plenty of reasons for this: habits that bring comfort, the structure and biology of the jaw itself as well as the effects of anxiety. From a very young age, many of us learn that saying exactly what we're thinking can have consequences. We might get into trouble, hurt someone's feelings, or be judged. So, we learn to hold back. Over time, that restraint can become physical as well as emotional, settling into our muscles, including those of the face and jaw without us even noticing.

The consequence? Not only do we struggle to express what we truly need to say and risk not being fully understood, but we also carry that tension physically. It stays with us. Tension and anxious thoughts often go hand in hand throughout our lives, until we begin to understand the connection.

Knowledge really is power!

That’s why one of the first things I address during hypnosis is releasing tension from the jaw. It’s one of the quickest ways to help both the mind and body relax.

Dribble? No problem - I wash my throw after every client anyway! And, of course, it’s perfectly possible to have a deeply relaxed jaw while keeping your mouth closed.

Another wonderful technique for reducing tension is progressive muscle relaxation. A simple body scan can help you notice where you’re holding stress - starting with the facial muscles and jaw, then moving through the neck and shoulders, arms and hands, chest, stomach, legs, and finally your feet. By systematically tensing and then releasing each muscle group, you encourage both body and mind to let go.

Sometimes, the fastest way to quiet the mind is not to challenge every thought, but simply to release the tension the body has been carrying all along.